Company Policy

I saw the door crack open, and I released the trigger on the sprayer. Claire’s head poked out and I waved her through. I read her lips saying, “Thanks for not spraying me,” and I shouted back. “That was tempting Claire!” I had to yell twice over the noise of the pressure washer. As soon as she was gone, I chided myself. What was wrong with me? Why would I let such a golden opportunity pass me by? Right then, I decided. I was enacting an all-spray policy. Anybody, anybody at all, who came within reach was going to get pressure washed right in the face.

Sheri was my next available target. She parked at the back gate and walked in, smiling and waving. I smiled back, and let her get past the point of no return. Then I turned the sprayer in her direction and chased her all the way to the back door. She just disappeared in the mist. I liked my new policy. I ran out of gas not long later, and Eric showed up to say hi. We went to Chevron together, then hung out for a few minutes in my office. We passed through Claire’s room on our way back out front. She thanked me again. Immediately, I informed her that I had every intention of soaking her the next time she gave me a chance. When we were outside, I berated myself once more. Why would I warn her? Now she would never come back out.

It wasn’t long after I started the machine back up that I turned around and saw Jeff  walking toward me. He had something in his hand. I aimed and pulled the trigger. He held up his hands and I just kept spraying. After a second, I saw that he was holding up a lollipop he was going to offer to me. I sprayed him all the way back inside, laughing and laughing and laughing. Who needs lollipops? And then, the back door of the MPR opened again. Claire’s face popped out, happy, hopeful that I had been joking.

There was not a cell of my whole body that hesitated. I had the strongest nozzle the sprayer comes with attached and I shot it right at her face. She recoiled and screamed and I kept spraying through the gap of the open door until it was closed. Ahhhhhh. Hours later, Ronnie became my last victim of the day. He drove up in the golf cart, obviously hot. He drove right into the stream and stopped. I laughed even more this time as he sputtered and blinked. I couldn’t keep the stream on him, I was laughing so hard.

Then it became time to put my toy away and go home. I’ve got about an hour’s worth of work left to do tomorrow if anybody wants to stop by.

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Discussion

One thought on “Company Policy

  1. Good work tom, very amusing.

    Posted by Josh | 12/30/2010, 3:17 pm

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